Anesthesia shouldn’t be the only Path to Relaxation 😴

Recently my husband had to undergo a particularly unpleasant emergency medical procedure. What was particularly striking about all of this was that despite the crazy amount of pain and discomfort, my husband said he was “looking forward to the restful break” during the anesthesia. What??!

He continued on with a disturbing admission that despite us both retiring early from our W-2 jobs and aiming to live life on our own terms, somehow it seems we still have ended up wrapped up in the daily hustle and bustle – shuttling our two kids around, taking on multiple house and rental property projects, and trying to travel every chance we can. And I realized he was right. Somehow along the way we have created a life as busy and stressful as the one we came from.

One currently popular reflection exercise is writing out your Ideal Day. And yes, that’s a great thought exercise, but if you have any external responsibilities (kids, elderly parents, work, etc.), it’s just not practical. I would love to get up at 8am every day and enjoy sipping my tea and reading for an hour, but my kids have to be at school by 7:30am. So my Ideal Day has gone out the window even before it’s started!

A potentially better way to start designing an ideal life is to focus more on the question of what you want to BE, HAVE, and DO – living a life based on your values. So go ahead and take a moment to think about what these mean to you:

👉 What do I want to BE? For me, I want to be present, curious, and feel like I’m providing value to others.

👉 What do I want to HAVE? Physical things that add value to my life include my guitar, my suitcase (so I can travel!), and my cats.

👉 What do I want to DO? I want to nurture a partnership with my husband, engage well with my kids (sometimes challenging with a preteen!), travel to new places, play music, keep my body in good functional shape, build and maintain a supportive community of friends, and help empower other women around their finances so they can create lives that they love.

And the BIG QUESTION: How does my current life align or not align with the answers above?? (If I write out my answer to that here, we’d be here all day. But it’s definitely worth taking the time to think through!)

Let’s all try to make it a goal to at least live a life where we don’t need to look forward to relaxing with anesthesia.

Leave a comment below and let us know what you want to BE, HAVE, and DO!

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